I have to share some things I have learned in my job
In my job, I review criminal and psychiatric files of
imprisoned sex offenders who are approaching their
release date. I decide if they are likely to re-offend
based on certain criteria and then civilly commit them
to a sex offender treatment facility if I decide that
they are at significant risk to re-offend
I have read hundreds and hundreds of files, and have
taken note of some of the mistakes women make. Let me
preface this by saying that a woman is NEVER EVER EVER
at fault for being raped or attacked, but there are
definitely ways to reduce your risk of being a victim.
Here are the most common mistakes women make that
could result in them getting kidnapped, attacked,
1. Getting into the attacker’s car when he pulls a
gun and orders you to get into his vehicle.
Most attackers don’t want to shoot you … they want
you to get into the car so that they can drive you to
a deserted place and torture you. Don’t comply. Run
screaming. It is MUCH more likely than not that he
will just move on to an easier target.
2. Pulling over when a man drives alongside of you
pointing at your car pretending something is wrong.
If this happens, drive to the nearest well-lit and
populated gas station and look the car over yourself
(or ask an attendant). Never pull over. Believe it
or not, many women have fallen for this for fear of
their car spontaneously exploding in the middle of the
road. Not likely.
3. Not locking your doors while driving.
I have read several cases where the attacker simply
walks up to a woman’s car while she’s at a traffic
light and jumps in with his gun or knife drawn.
4. Opening your front door when you have not
positively identified who is there.
If you don’t have a peep hole, get one. I’ve seen
countless cases where the attacker gains access to his
victims simply by knocking on their door.
Don’t let an attacker get into your home. He then has
a private, relatively soundproof place to attack you.
5. Not being alert in parking lots.
If you go to the grocery store at night, don’t be shy
about asking for an escort to your car. Too many
women are abducted from parking lots or even raped in
the parking lot.
Look in your back seat before entering your car. Cars
provide endless hiding places for attackers, both
inside them and in between them.
Be aware of your surroundings by looking to the left
and right and behind you with your head up all the
time. You may appear paranoid and look funny to
others, but an attacker will think twice about
approaching someone who appears so aware of what’s
6. Trusting a clean cut, honest looking stranger.
I see mug shots of every sex offender in the state of
Florida. They do not look like monsters. They often
look like they could be your friendly grocer, bank
teller, waiter, neighbor, clergy, doctor, etc. They
are every age between 15 and 90, and probably beyond.
Only a small minority actually look scary.
I just read a case yesterday of a man with only one
leg who beat up his victim with his crutch before he
raped her. Who would have ever thought that a
one-legged man could be a rapist?
7. Trusting people to be alone with your children.
This is a difficult one, because child molesters end
up being the LAST person the parents would believe is
Most of the child molesting cases I see involve the
stepfather, the uncle, the sister’s boyfriend, the
mother’s boyfriend, the grandfather, the baby-sitter,
the neighbor, the family friend, the youth camp
director, day care worker, etc. Although rare, even
women can be molesters.
In every case, the perpetrator is a nice guy,
trusting, good with children, and the family is
baffled or even in disbelief that the person could be
abusing their child.
When it comes to your children and grandchildren, be
suspicious of everyone, no matter who they are. And
pay attention to what your child says and how he/she
reacts to the mention of different people in their
I didn’t mean to make anyone uncomfortable with this,
but I am at work right now reviewing files, and
realized that this email is a way I can reach many
women at one time. I have the dirty job of reading
all these files, and it makes me feel good to know
that I can share some inferences from what I have
learned. This is not an exhaustive list of what not
to do, but just some things that I have observed more
than just a few times.
Pass this on to the women in your lives.